In years, I am young; in experience, I am lacking. I have barely
grasped the adult world yet, with all its intricacies and protocols. It can
often be a scary and daunting place to navigate, and there are times when my
heart is filled with fear and doubt.
Yet, amidst all the confusion, I am guided by an inner
strength that pulls all my shaking parts together. I have my inner wisdom to
listen to – and right now it is saying that despite all the changes happening in
my life, I should never give up on my ideals.
A woman must learn to adapt, but she must not allow her soul
and values to be compromised in process. To give value to her Yes, she must
learn to say No to those that make her less of what she is.
After all, what is a woman without her principles?
I refuse to be measured
by my gender
I am living in an era of endless opportunities, an achievement
countless women have shed a lot of blood, tears, and sweat to pass on to my generation.
But, even though many glass ceilings have already been broken, there linger stereotypes
that need to be smashed.
I refuse to be sexualized, to be viewed as a trophy, or to
be displayed around like a mannequin. I have brains as sharp as my stilettos
(if I choose to wear them) and I’m not going to let my ideas rot to please
someone’s ego. I don’t need to ooze testosterone to be successful in the endeavors
I pursue. Most importantly, I don’t need a man’s fat purse to feed me – I can
earn my keep and fund brick by brick my queendom.
Yet, I am also aware that there are still many women who lack
the education, the choices and the freedom to blossom into their fullest
potential. It is my responsibility to extend my hand, arm them with a hammer,
and help them break through that barrier of repression and inequality.
I refuse to allow myself and any female be taken for granted,
underestimated, and condescended because we weren’t born with a rod hanging
out of our anatomy.
I refuse to be defined
by my status
If I had a child at a young age, I will raise up my chin because
I had bravely chosen to respect the life that had formed in my womb. If I am a single parent, I will be proud that
I was strong enough to make the decision to receive this gift alone; knowing
that the happiness it will give will make up for whomever that has disappeared in my life.
If I am already married, I will show the world that I am
still very much alive, that I can thrive with my own identity and has not faded under my husband’s shadow. My life is definitely not over just because I tied
the knot.
If I am single, I will not yield to the pressures of finding
someone to “complete me.” God’s love pervades my entire being and I am totally,
completely, perfectly loved. I know I
will never be happy in a relationship unless I have learned how to be happy on
my own, and will not rush into a relationship that is bound to be futile. I
will instead wisely use this gift of time to embark on more adventures, develop
myself, and serve the world. Whether I
meet God’s best or not in this lifetime, it will be okay because I am still
fabulous no matter what.
I refuse to measure my happiness based on my status. The real
essence of a woman is how she has played the cards life has dealt her with. She
is not defined by her number of baby bumps or her ability to find Prince
Charming; it is how she lives her life gracefully and fiercely, in whatever
circumstances she is in.
I refuse to be boxed
by society’s conventions or by what others think I should do
I respect rules and I know how to listen; but, in the end, I’ll
have to rely on my inner compass to determine whether I am taking the right
path or not. We all have different journeys set for us – Dorothy was meant to be
whisked to Oz while Alice was destined to stumble upon Wonderland.
I am living in a time where the world is rapidly changing – the
old structures are crumbling and the gatekeepers are leaving. In this daunting yet exciting climate I must
create myself, with the freedom to become more creative, innovative, and
flexible.
But, of course, there will always be resistance, and people
will always tell you what they think you should do. This is where a timeless principle
comes in – that one must have the courage to pursue one’s dreams before it is
too late, and must not let the critics steal them away.
It is this realization that has emboldened women in the past
to leave their comfortable lives in the East and hitch their wagons to the
West, or sacrifice a cushy corporate job in the present to hit the road and
travel, or perhaps, depart Earth in the future to become a Star Trek explorer.
They all have heeded their personal callings, however crazy
or impossible they may sound.
I refuse to believe that I am unworthy of my dreams and that
I am incapable of achieving them. I will not go through life ticking off a checklist
of must-haves; I will blaze my own path and live life on my own terms.
Labels: Musings and Opinions
