Non Standard Issue: Imperfect

Let’s call her Lolita. Lolita is very beautiful, with the face and the figure to put Barbie to shame. Yet, though from the eyes of others she is impeccably beautiful, she feels ugly and is unhappy with her looks. While leafing through the pages of her fashion magazines and while surfing the channels of the television, she constantly asks why she, Lolita, cannot be as fabulous as that actress, why she, Lolita, cannot be as thin as that model. She worried a lot and became so anxious about becoming fat that she became anorexic. Yet skeletal she may have become, she still lived in constant fear that a tiny sliver of food can make her weight balloon.

How many Lolitas are in the world today? How many girls are seeing their reflection through the twisted mirrors of society? How many of them hate themselves for not being able to have the perfect face, the perfect body, the perfect everything? How many among us are counting our imperfections and dwelling on them?

Somehow, we have been trapped in a narrow box. Hollywood and the media has redefined beauty, making us believe that in order to be beautiful, perfection is a must, and often, with the message that you need to compromise who you are just to achieve their own version of “perfect beauty.” Call it a modern day Hitler. But unlike the Nazi leader who ruthlessly cleaned the ranks of the Germans just to leave only those he deemed perfect, those people with blond hair and blue eyes, the Hitler of today works in a more subtle yet similarly dangerous way.

The craze for perfection has caused a lot of girls around the world to embrace the deathly grips of anorexia, forcing them to starve themselves in order to be thin. No wonder that beauty clinics are sprouting like mushrooms. A little nip and tuck here to “cuten” the nose or “pouten” the lips or some injections here to upsize the boobs and the butt. That explains too the beauty products flooding the market, often with conflicting messages that make you want to laugh. If you have sun-kissed skin, here is something to whiten you, but if you are as fair as Snow White, apply this to get the perfect tan. Go figure it out.

Bottom-line is, instead of making us “perfectly beautiful”, they make us “perfectly depressed” and “perfectly insecure”. Because in reality, no one can be “perfectly perfect”.

Every woman has the right to make her own choices, instead of forcing herself to conform to society’s narrow-minded version of what she is supposed to become. If she believes she needs some help to improve her looks and boost her confidence, then she has absolutely the right to. If she hates make-up and happy without all the frivolities, then she is perfectly free to do so. For real beauty comes with the total acceptance of one’s self, of being comfortable with one’s skin, and of liking one’s self.

Beauty is not quantifiable. It is not limited to a 36-24-36, cup D, 5’8” body. Beauty is like a snowflake; no two people are wonderful in the same way. We are more like diamonds made beautiful and unique by our flaws. Tall or petite, full-figured or skinny, well-endowed in the front and behind or not, vanilla or chocolate-skinned, outspoken or shy, Einstein-minded or talented in some other ways, all women are beautiful. The celebration of beauty is the celebration of diversity.